December 2010
7 posts
I don't have to pay for parking as long as I'm...
fmylife:
Today, I gave my friend a ride to town so she wouldn’t have to pay the $10 to park. While waiting to pick her up, I grabbed a bite to eat. Upon returning to my car, I found a $55 parking ticket on my windshield. FML
fmylife:
Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too… I was eating a steak. FML
Lying about yourself to get in someone’s pants: always a good idea.
fmylife:
Today, I found out that my husbands secretary named her new baby boy after my husband. Everyone at the office thinks it’s funny. My husband says it’s a coincidence. FML
Um, it is a coincidence. Lots of people have the same names as others.
<cough>paranoidpsycho<cough>
But I don't need to keep my eyes on the road if...
fmylife:
Today, I lost my job. I was so upset that I put in my favorite mix CD of all the songs that get me feeling better. While scanning for my favorite song, I hit the car in front of me. FML
fmylife:
Today, my boss texted me to say the office was closed because of the snow. I begged him to let me go in anyway because I had nothing to do all day. I have no life, friends or hobbies. FML
Here’s an idea! GET A HOBBY
fmylife:
Today, I received an envelope from my boss. I opened the flap to peek inside and the paper was pink. Freaking out, I then told my entire branch what I really think of them. The pink slip turned out to be a party invite. Guess who’s no longer invited, or employed. FML
Because not reading things and telling people off are always both great ideas.
Anonymous asked: Your comments on FML posts make my anger issues look petty. Chill the fuck out!